I’ve been having trouble figuring out exactly what I want
to say in this post. I could blather on
about how great my new job has been – I’m loving it, by the way – but that is
only a small portion of what I want to convey.
I’ve talked it out with a few friends and tried several times to gather
my thoughts enough to write a cohesive post. We’ll see if I succeed this time.
I think the theme of what I’ve been learning over the
past months is how good God is to me and how much His love is for me. How He wants my good, not just to use me for
others’ good. I like for my life and the
things I do to have a purpose so the thought that what I do and what I go
through is so that I can encourage others has never bothered me. I’m not sure it ever occurred to me – until recently
– to consider that events are not merely meant to strengthen me to help others,
but to build me up just because.
Just because God is love.
I’m not particularly good with emotions; love and loyalty
go hand in hand for me but I’m not great at conveying it. Nor am I good with expecting others to
actively show me that they love me. The knowledge
is in my head but I still act like I have to go it alone and don’t consciously
expect those who love me to show it. I
don’t expect someone else to actively seek my well-being without any other
motives. It sounds weird when I put it
that way but it’s the best I know to express how I act. It isn’t fair to my friends and family, I
know, and I’m learning better. I think
that’s a little of why I hadn’t thought of God’s love being for me personally.
Since I lost my job and in the days and weeks that I was
hurting and looking for a new job, God has been showing me how much He cares
for me in a myriad of ways. A friend who
invited me to stay with her for four days – I had hoped for two at the
most. My Mom and Dad being steady rocks
as I was floundering. Another friend who
I am used to encouraging turned the
tables and was instead my
encourager. Yet another friend with whom
I reconnected and who has played a role much like what I imagine an older
sister would. New friends from a Bible
study group who I’ve barely known a month and yet are calling to find out if I’m
coming to join them at volleyball.
Learning how to mow my own yard so I can feel that accomplishment. A double rainbow more brilliant than any
other and a myriad of other things less easy to put into words.
And the consolation that no, this trial that I am going
through right now is not a good thing in and of itself – but good will come of
it.
God’s love is as vast and powerful as an ocean. It pulls you in, drags you deeper, and erodes
the shifting sands of what you think is your foundation. It is terrifying at times but glorious in its
immensity. We can never plumb the depths
of His love. Never.
Because God is love, He is not content to leave us as we
are; He is unwilling to let us live as less than what He has planned. And that often means trials, struggles, and
general unpleasantness. His love isn’t
easy but it is rich. And it is for you.
God’s love is for you.
He doesn’t put us through hard times, terrible times,
only so He can use us later on. We are
not, I am not, merely a tool that He refines
so that it will work better. Not just a
knife He sharpens to carve someone else into a beautiful design. No. I
am His workmanship, His carefully made work of art, which He is constantly
refining and tweaking and testing so that I will be something beautiful just
because. I may be a very useful
something – like an elegant tea set – but the beauty is despite its
functionality, not the cause of it.
It’s like when I make an Excel workbook for someone (don’t
laugh, I really like building complex
workbooks). I don’t just make it
functional for the person who needs it.
I’m tweaking the formatting, adjusting the column and row widths, adding
extra flourish to the formulas just so the document is visually appealing. It would be just as useful if it wasn’t
brightly colored and used plain fonts instead of fancy ones. But I add the extra pieces and I’m always
working on it just because I enjoy it and I want the document to be
pretty. I want it to be lovely because
the spreadsheet is, in a way, a reflection of me and I want it to be a good
one.
I guess God is the same way. The verse that says we are His work of art
goes on to say that we are “created in Christ Jesus” (Ephesians 2:10). In the beginning, man and woman alike were
created in the image of God (Genesis 1:27).
And one day, those who have put their faith Jesus as their savior will
see God as He is and “we shall be like him” because of it (1 John 3:2). In 1 Corinthians 13, commonly known as the “love
chapter” of the Bible, we see that we know God and ourselves only as a dim
reflection, but someday, we’ll see God face to face (vs. 12). Until the day comes when we are perfected
before him, God is working on us so that we will be a beautiful reflection of
Him and His love.
The mirror may be dim, but He’s polishing it clearer
day-by-day.
“You turned the tables over
There in your father's temple
You cracked a whip and raised a shout
My daughter asked me why
I said, "Love is never simple
It draws 'em in and drives 'em out."
I saw you there but it was too late to change my course
And I collided with a beautiful immovable force
And so the stone that I rejected
It has become the Cornerstone”
There in your father's temple
You cracked a whip and raised a shout
My daughter asked me why
I said, "Love is never simple
It draws 'em in and drives 'em out."
I saw you there but it was too late to change my course
And I collided with a beautiful immovable force
And so the stone that I rejected
It has become the Cornerstone”
From “The Cornerstone” by Andrew Peterson
